Hi hello welcome! This post is not edible or particularly upbeat, but thanks for being here anyways.
Someone commented recently on one of my youtube videos something along the lines of “this channel used to be so good, now every video is sponsored”. Careless negativity like that doesn’t really upset me, but it did leave me with some thoughts…
- Be kind. You never know someone’s situation or story.
- I genuinely love every brand I partner with, and would use their products in my kitchen whether they paid me or not. So just because a recipe is sponsored doesn’t make it any less delicious, and it doesn’t mean I created it with any less authenticity or effort.
- I haven’t been creating and sharing new recipes at the same rate I used to (and want to!), so it’s not more sponsored recipes it’s just fewer recipes overall. But sometimes that happens because LIFE.
I don’t write a lot about my life because I assume you are here for recipes not to read about me. And as much as I love vulnerability, it still scares me too. Life posts especially scare me when they aren’t going to be about how happy I am and spunky things are. Honestly my offline life feels really messy right now, which makes me question if it’s too real? too much? too unpositive?
But in a world of undersharing the not-shiny stuff, I’m going to overshare for a minute and press publish before I overthink myself out of it after 37 revisions and asking 3 people to read it first.
I’m emotionally just tired
My heart hurts. The past few months have been emotionally challenging like I’ve never known before. I’m a little less idealistic now, a little less trusting, but more sure of who I am than ever.
I’ve learned to validate my feelings for myself even if the world says I’m too sensitive. Sometimes I’m not going to understand why. Sometimes I won’t get the conversation and closure I want, but I can’t ignore what’s said by silence.
I’ve learned that honesty and kindness can’t always solve it. That hope will keep me hurting longer than memories. And that eventually, when I’ve tried as hard as I can and maybe harder than I should, all that’s left to do is let him go.
Sometimes I wish I could be mad beause mad seems easier than so deeply sad. I wouldn’t undo anything even if I could, but I do look forward to a future phase of life that involves less crying.
I’m moving
Again. At the end of August.
And it’s bittersweet. Florida still feels like home and I know I need to go, but there are definitely things I will miss about this place.
Like my apartment with its giant warehouse windows that look out onto the river, exposed brick walls, and open kitchen I love so much. Or the communal porch with rocking chairs where I like to work in the evenings while spying on the resident stray kittens (even if the mosquitoes make all of that a little less lovely than it sounds).
And the little moments that make me smile and think only in a small town. Like the post office that is located inside the health food store and only accepts credit cards if it’s over $9 (which for me is never). Or the ladies who invited me into their sidewalk gossip pow wow just because I happened to be walking by with my dog. Or the way people wave and say hi in a way that feels like we know each other when we don’t.
Although I must say North Carolina, I do not understand your fondness for shoes. In Florida when I am barefoot 90% of the time no one cares or even notices, here everyone comments.
But I found a new apartment in FL that I love near the water (or at least I think I will love it, it’s not actually done being built yet so…fingers crossed!) And I cannot wait to be close to good friends again. And I’m excited for new creative/business developments to come. It feels hectic moving twice in 6 months, but right now it feels most right.
I’m loving lately…
Live music. There’s nothing quite like the energy of dancing in the dark amidst thousands of strangers outside under a perfect 75° sunset. For a few hours no one is stressed, everyone is just present and happy. That’s a vibe. If you’ve never taken yourself to a concert before, I highly recommend it.
Fiction. I haven’t read fiction just for fun in years. But recently I started An American Marriage (in real life non-ebook form) on recommendation from a friend and my sister, and it has reminded me how much I enjoy it.
Kindness. Randomly from strangers. Like shoutout to the man I’ve never met before who struck up a 15 minute conversation with me in my apartment parking lot because he saw me crying in my car. Better yet he didn’t start it with “Are you okay?” He just pretended like I wasn’t crying, and kept talking until that was true.
And, of course, kindness from friends. Old friends who check in, and new people in my life who are down to deep dive and skip the small talk. Getting to know people you just vibe with and relate to is one of my favorite things.
Road trips that let me escape for a moment and make me appreciate home when I get back.
Podcasts that make me laugh. A couple of personal favorites are this one and this one.
Quotes/poetry that eloquently remind me my feelings are not unique, which is beautifully comforting.
Caring less. Overthinking less. Posting more instagram stories of my dog even if no one else finds her as cute as I do. Saying no when I want to just because I want to. Not wearing makup most days. Remembering no one is watching or judging as closely as we think. Just generally embracing IDGAF-ness more than ever.
So no I’m not at my creative best right now, but I know I will get back there. And in the meantime I am choosing not to feel bad about that. I am choosing to accept that sometimes I will be killing it at work/life and sometimes I won’t, and that is perfectly okay.
Meet yourself wherever you’re at, and have compassion for the current you.
And shoutout to Haley for inspiring me to write this post by openly sharing about her own (very relatable) life changes. Also this woman makes crazy good baked things fyi.
Note to brain: If I could ever write one of these personal posts during normal daylight hours, that’d be cool.
Thanks for reading! xo
I actually love seeing this post. I always wonder about the girl behind all the amazing recipes. Hopefully this next phase in your life brings you a lot of happiness and peace.
Aw thanks Kelsey❤️ I enjoy writing and sharing these too, so I appreciate you for reading!
Me too 🥰
Thank you for reading this one, much love Kasia💕
I LOVE your recipes and your creativity! I have tried a lot of your recipes and as you said, whether it’s sponsored or not, it is always delicious and impressive. I have started to use oat flours, dates, soaked cashews and coconut milk because of your recipe. You are giving positive effects to many people so I really hope to see your posts for a long time 🙂
Thanks for the post. All I can say is keep doing you. I’ve learned that more than anything these last 6 months..no more labels and unrealistic expectations. We need to learn to embrace and enjoy change and that’s hardest for me,but I’m learning to not quite embrace but breathe through the uncomfortable. You got this!!
Now I would like to Ask you remove those green social media balls from the side because you can’t read what you’re saying with them all along the left side..just suggestion. 🙋
Oh no, I just disabled them! On your phone or computer if you don’t mind me asking?
And THANK YOU for reading, your words feel so very true for me too. Expectations are at the root of so much unhappiness. If we can live and do and give without expectations…thats the real magic! So so hard too though. And completely relate to breathing through the discomfort as well. The only way out of feelings is through, and it won’t always going to be fun but it’s necessary🙃
On my phone!
You’re doing great!
Thanks Estee! Truly appreciate you❤️
An American marriage is such a good book! Enjoy!
Yes absolutely enjoying it so far! Thanks for reading Larissa❤️
Here for all of it, Natalie. The recipes have always been SO GOOD, and knowing a little piece of the complexity of the woman behind it all makes it even better for me. It’s been years and I’m still working my way through your index of recipes (it’s hard when my family has so many favorites on repeat). 🙂 I’m so grateful for how you’ve added to my life through food and would support beyond just sponsored content if you gave the opportunity. Not going anywhere and respect and appreciate your need to be human.
Oh Holly, I love that last sentence so very much! Yes we all gotta be human even when it’s messy and hard, and more importantly not hide those bits. Truly truly appreciate your support, thank you and much love💕
I loved learning a bit more about the person behind all those amazing recipes!!!💜
I really appreciate you taking the time, Luka💕 Beautiful name btw!
When I woke up this morning, something told me to hop over here and I’m glad I did ❤️ Thank you for your vulnerability and courage to share a little more about life and what’s going on. The careless negativity will forever baffle me and I was so surprised by that specific comment. I’ve been following your journey (here and YouTube) for years and not once have I felt that authenticity has decreased…if anything, over the years, it has expanded. It makes my heart literally hurt to know what you’ve been going through…especially because I know you’re an amazing human ❤️ I’m glad you have Nolan and good friends……and the kindness of strangers, what a good man for doing that! I read the things you’re loving lately with a big smile on my face – it’s the little things ❤️❤️❤️ And seeing pics of you always makes me happy. I have a REALLY good feeling about this move and know that I will always be here for you if you need anything. Sending the biggest hugs your way and SO MUCH LOVE 🤗❤️😘
P.S. – I’m off to check out those podcasts before Willow finally wakes up! Love you!
Hehe your vulnerability radar is GOOD😂 Even though I’ve already told you much of this❤️❤️ I am honestly somewhat grateful for such comments because they can inspire thoughts like this, and remind me that the opinions of those who don’t really know us don’t really matter. It is absolutely the little things and the love of the people who do know us that makes all the difference. Truly appreciate you and the novel texts and all your support for all these years😘 xoxo
I loved reading this, even though I’m sad for you that you’re sad. You’re a great writer – intelligent with loads of wit – so you should include more of it on your blog! Thanks for sharing with us.
Shelly THANK YOU! That is so kind of you to say and wonderful to know that you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy writing them❤️
Thank you so much for sharing, Natalie. Reading other’s not-so-shiny feelings and experiences makes me feel less alienated in my own and I think posts like these are very important, although I know they’re super scary to put out there sometimes. We’re sensitive human beings, not recipe-making machines! I hope these changes will give you a fresh start and re-invigorate your life in lots of positive ways.
By the way, I know it’s hard to see for yourself, but from an outside perspective, you always look like you’re kicking ass and never come across inauthentic.
“We’re sensitive human beings, not recipe-making machines” 👈 YES!! It is so true, and easy to forget in the world of perfect IG photos and trying to keep up with the daily pace of it all. But I think the not happy, not easy, not perfect parts are the most universal and relatable. Worth sharing, even when it’s scary. And thank you for your objective perspective too, it doesn’t feel that way so I truly appreciate that❤️
Oh my gosh, I’m tearing up!! This is beautifully written. Of course we care about the beautiful creator of these gorgeous recipes. I absolutely love reading these posts, Natalie, so thank you for sharing this side of yourself. You’ve been through a storm, and it’s scary as heck. But you’ve gained so much from it, and moved through it with such beauty and grace. Everyone has a lot to learn from you. I’m so beyond grateful that we’ve connected, and I’m so grateful you wrote this- life really has been freaking TOUGH lately, but you’ve reminded me to keep smiling at the little moments. Thank you so so much for that, and here’s to an even more beautiful season to come <3
Aw you are so very kind, THANK YOU❤️❤️ You were absolutely on my mind in the part about connecting to new people you just relate too so quick, I feel very fortunate that we connected and it’s made my days/weeks brighter chatting with you too! You support means so much to me😘 xo
I love reading more about you! Keep the monthly updates coming! Thank you for sharing your heart and vulnerability, it makes the world a more beautiful place.
Aw thank you Sher! I look up to your photography skills like crazy and have for years, so the fact that you took the time to read this means SO much to me💕 Vulnerability is beautiful.
Every time I see a new blog post or video form you I wonder “how does she do it?” You consistently provide high quality content to people who don’t understand how much time, craftsmanship, stress and effort goes into producing it. And for that, I not only salute you, but COMPLETELY 1000% respect the need to slow down. Forever and always, put yourself first ❤️ I’ll still be here for your next recipe whether it’s in 2 days or 2 years. Thanks for being so awesome and super inspiring to me! x
Ohmygoodness you are the best❤️ Let’s hope it’s before 2019 is over haha, but your support either way means the world to me! I know you know the overwhelming feeling of trying to keep up with it all too, and yes sometimes slowing down and taking care of other life/emotional things is necessary. I really really appreciate you taking the time to read and comment, Shivani. Much love! xo
Oh Natalie, I literally teared up at the image of the man coming to your car when you were crying. What a sweet man. I’m so sorry to hear you are struggling right now. I can definitely relate to the exhaustion part and lack of motivation to write recipes. I was just talking to another blogger friend yesterday a bout this. This summer I’ve been so busy and overwhelmed with so much going on, but on top of that, as much as I love to create new recipes, I’ve lacked the oomph and fire to get them done like I normally have. I think I’ve just been enjoying a break and not feeling pressured to always have to post, post, post. Allowing myself to just live.
And to the person who said that rude comment, honestly, you have never ONCE come across as anything other than completely pure and real. Never once have I felt you were unauthentic. I know you only share products you use and love. People can be so rude and insensitive and forget we are a human on the other side and not robots churning out recipes.
I love all the pictures you shared here and you know I love your apartment and jeans, haha, since I already told you, lol! And you know how much I love your sweet doggy. Love the pics you share in your stories.
I know you will come out of this even stronger, life’s challenges mold us and make us better, stronger people. xoxo
That is absolutely true, and I already feel the strength and greater self awareness the past 6 months has brought me. And honestly those comments don’t bother me, they just remind me that the opinions of those who don’t know me don’t really matter. It’s the support of beautiful friends like you that matters, so thank you for that. Always❤️❤️ The summer is weird for blogging. I hate ruining a trip or vacation by stressing about keeping up with posting, so I think it is a perfect time to relax and enjoy life and people more. I hope you have been savoring lots of sweet memories with your family and letting the motivation come back naturally☺️ Thanks for reading and for the jeans chat😂 Much love to you my friend! xo
I can totally relate to this. I’ve been going through one of the most difficult periods of my life ever for the past 9 months, with no end in sight, and have really struggled with creativity and keeping my blog going. I go through fits and spurts where I have some great ideas, then struggle to summon up the motivation to make them happen.
Know though that this difficult time of your life will pass and ultimately make you stronger. (I need to remember that myself).
You are incredibly good at what you do and it will all be there waiting for you with bells on when you are good and ready. Until then be kind to yourself and do what you can, when you can, and cry when you need to. Letting it all out is good.
Oh and the people with careless negativity can stick it where the sun don’t shine. You don’t need to answer to them. They aren’t your people. Your people get it, and you, and know that life happens.
Take care Natalie x
“waiting for you with bells on” 👈 this totally made me smile and is a wonderful reminder that I need to keep in mind. Thank you for reading Mel, and I am sorry to hear that life has been extra challenging for you lately too💕 My motivation comes in waves too, sometimes diving into work feels like the best thing and other times crying on the floor is what needs to happen. I hope you are taking all of this beautiful advice and being very kind and compassionate with yourself right now too. Sending you all the good thoughts for a less tear-filled future to you too! xoxo
Mel – you and Natalie are my top fave bloggers – the ones I actually do bother to read!! So, hope you feel better soon too!
Thank you for posting this. It’s important for all of us to know and accept we go through changes. Sending lots of love your way! Thank you for all your amazing recipes and your personal post💗
No worries I gotcha, for some reason I can edit it but you can’t (whatcha thinking wordpress??) Regardless, THANK YOU so much for reading this one Millie and for your kind words❤️ Acceptance for being human is so much harder than it should be, but sharing definitely helps😊
💗
Ugh… how do I edit???!
I meant to say, thank you for “posting” this.
So sorry for my weird autocorrect typo.
Always enjoy your posts. Come as you are us always how I roll.😎 sending positive energy your way.🌻
It really does seem like the best way to do life–how you are right now and without apologizing for it even when it’s messy. Thanks for reading and the positive vibes, Mary❤️
Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and realness. I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time right now. One thing that stands out is that you seem to know yourself really well which is one of the greatest strengths in life. How kind that man was to just be with you when you were wide open. Such a beautiful example of goodness in the world. Gah… I’m not crying, you’re crying 😛 Anyway, I wish you all the best in your move, your new nest and taking the time you need to recenter. <3
First of all THANK YOU for taking the time to read, Bronwyn💕 I don’t know that we’ve ever really connected, but I must say I’ve admired your beautiful photography for some time now (especially with cupcakes…girl you are gifted with those little guys!) And second, I really appreciate that you picked up on self awareness in this post because that is something that is incredibly important to me in life and I try to bring into everything I say/write. It truly is the biggest strength, makes everything else easier. Thank you for the positive wishes, and much love to you! xo
You are so incredible for opening up to your followers and for sharing your feelings. We are just another support group to walk you through this process. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and focus on getting just a LITTLE bit better each day! We all love you and your work, and are here for you every step of the way!
Aw thank you, Elinor💕 I am definitely feeling the support today, and your words mean so much to me! It really is about the little victories and mini progress, isn’t it☺️ Much love!!
Thanks for sharing. I like learning more about the people who have the ability to make my belly so happy. I too am a super sensitive person. One who always dives into books and reads constantly when life gets messy. Someway it seems to help straighten me out. And I just read American Marriage a few weeks ago! What a good book!! I hope you feel better soon <3
I am totally enjoying it so far, and yes reading really does help ground me in offline life in a way I forgot☺️ I appreciate you reading this and relating to the sensitive part. I truly think it is a strength, even if sometimes it’s hard to remember that when things hurt extra hard. Much love to you, your support means a lot to me Sarah💕
Okay, I’m not the first person to read this post, like I said I would be…but I am so happy I eventually got to it. Thank you for being vulnerable and sharing. In this overly saturated world of never-ending content, it’s to remember there’s a real human being behind it all. A human being with real emotions and real life obstacles. I am looking forward to seeing more of your amazing content once you have time to rest emotionally and get back into the required headspace to churn out the work. And yay for random acts of kindness and nice strangers! Love you!
Hahaha timing is not important, even if you read it a year from now I would still be so very appreciative❤️ I completely agree with you, sometimes you gotta take a pause on cranking out content to check in mentally and emotionally. Which I know you’ve been doing lately too for your own reason and life transitions😊😊 Kindness always, from strangers and beautiful supportive friends like you! xoxo
I’m so sorry people feel that they have to bash you for having sponsors supporting your blog. Good grief, in this new gig economy, that’s what it’s all about! The rest of us are blessed and nourished by your posts (especially when we actually go beyond drooling over the food and actually cook it!). We would never have access to so much good content from you and other outstanding bloggers without such sponsors. Ignore the naysayers, I say, Go, girl 😊
I think it it the minority, most people know that sponsorships are a thing and not going away, but I am appreciative for that comment because this post was born of it☺️ It’s the hard stuff and the rough times that lead to the most change/growth, sometimes it just takes me some time to be able to see the positive. I appreciate your kind words and support so very much, Kati💕
Keep on keeping on, Natalie. Things will continue to unfold and may you find the blessings even along the rocky road of this moment in your life’s journey.
And, welcome back to Florida!!
Thank you for the kind words, Iris💕 You are so very right, without the rocky times we wouldn’t have the graceful ones☺️ Yes happy to be back soon, it will feel like coming home!
There is nothing more life affirming than an honest (and goodness) post about “the struggle”.
Life is so many, many things and nothing, if not difficult.
Thank you for breaking through the pristine, white walls of your “perfect” confections to let the sunshine in!
While I enjoy reading and occasionally making all of your marvelous treats, I must say, this was the best slice of “humble pie” I’ve had in as long as I can remember.
Be you, you’ve got this!
I couldn’t agree more, “the struggle” is the most universally relatable thing I think😆 And I adore what you said about letting the sunshine in, what a beautiful way to phrase it. Opening up honestly even about the hard stuff is always beautiful in my opinion☀️ I am happy you enjoyed this non-edible one too! Thank you for reading❤️❤️
As an avid follower who is old enough to be your mommy (grandma?), I truly appreciate all you are doing. I remember when you personally responded to a recipe question I had, thank you.
And I love reading about the “real person!” Sometimes it looks as if everyone has it together except me – and you would think at my age, it would finally happen.
As for those who complain about the ads, sponsors, etc. Let those people just go buy cookbooks, do those complainers work for free? I don’t think they realize how much time and effort goes in to creating recipes: shopping, creating, trying again, and again, cleaning the kitchen again and again.
Remember the words I try to live by, “Now is not forever.”
Oh my goodness! Such beautiful words to live by, thank you for sharing that🥰 As hard as change can be, it truly is beautiful and reassuring in a way too! Nothing is permanent–feelings included. I really appreciate you for following along and supporting over the years, and for reading this not-so-sweet post too💕 But if we ever really figured life out, wouldn’t that ruin all the fun parts too? Haha!
Hi Natalie, very much appreciated the ‘personal touch’. I too like to get to know the person that is so creative in her recipes; keep up the inspiring designing of desserts. Each knock we receive from life just makes us stronger to keep going to face the future. Incorporating all those feelings takes time, as they say, “time heals all wounds.” I have a question, however. I love the scene of your home above. But tell me, why does the sofa face a wall? : -)
PS that beautiful doggie seems to be wondering why you are so sad? S/he feels for you, and needs reassurance that you’re not sad because of him/her.
I appreciate you reading this one, Nechama! Yes it does take time to heal, and to find the good but there always is some💕 And there is actually a TV in front of the sofa, you just can’t see it behind that metal beam haha😆 She is my sweetest little supporter and has been through it all with me, love her to pieces and don’t worry she got plenty of treats after that photoshoot🐶
Natalie: heartfelt thanks for your brave and soulful post. You’re right, normally I click “jump to recipe”, not even bothering to read the pre-recipe dialog; and rarely do I share anything at all when I post recipes my own blog and FB page, but your post today caused me to pause and ponder, and I thank you for that.; and please know I’m sending wholesome healing thoughts your way. – TheCleanVeganista
I didn’t even plan for that to be a takeaway from this post, but YES! I always assume people click Jump To Recipe too and don’t put as much heart into my posts, but this one has made me realize people like authentic sharing in addition to the recipes. As fun as cookies and cakes can be, sometimes it just feels so good to talk about the REAL stuff too☺️ Thanks for reading, and much love to you Lori! xoxo
Thank you for sharing your challenges. You are actually helping me with mine. You’re going to be fine, My Dear. We both are.
So very true. And so simply but beautifully said, Lydia💕 Much love and good thoughts to you!
I first read your life update post quickly this morning at home before needing to run several errands. I saw your post for the yummy looking icebox cake but it was the “sharing feelings” message that drew me in. I told myself then that I would re-read your message later and respond when I had more time. Well, I’ve re-read and, wow, allowing myself to sit with your message and “feel the feels” just blew me away. When I got to this part, “And that eventually, when I’ve tried as hard as I can and maybe harder than I should, all that’s left to do is let him go” the emotional tsunami took hold and then by the end of the next paragraph I was full-blown tears in the eyes to the point that it was hard to keep reading the words were so blurry. And as I kept reading a sole tear trickled down my right cheek. Um, yeah, I guess you can surmise by now that I too am a sensitive soul and feelings can pack a real wallop. I frequently find life overwhelming, that sensation of just “too muchness”. Anyway, enough about me. I just wanted to let you know that I so appreciate you sharing yourself and what you’re going through and that your message was deeply moving to me. I feel out of the loop because I don’t even remember reading that you moved to North Carolina. I must have missed that message. I hope your transition back to life in Florida goes smoothly. If I could I’d give you a hug. Geez, I’m crying again. Those are some powerful words you wrote. They obviously struck a chord with me! Take care, Natalie. I look forward to your next post, whatever and whenever it may be.
Victoria! I have to tell you I have actually read your comment 3 times since it came into my inbox last night and WOW. I am completely humbled that my words and experience could evoke so much emotion for you too, I think we relate quite a lot on how we experience life☺️ I truly believe being sensitive and feeling all the feels as they come up is a strength, even if sometimes it feels like it amplifies the struggle. For me recognizing that I’m not wrong for being that way has been huge. Not wrong, just different. And I think more self-aware for it, which I am sure you can relate to too! I debated that sentence you pulled out about letting him go for so long–is it too much to share publicly? But it is truth, and your comment makes me glad I did share it since it is obviously a relatable place to have to be. Thank you for reading, and thank you for making me feel less alone❤️❤️ Much love and hugs to you! xo
Natalie
You made my Vegan life much easier,delishes, creative, artzi, yummy. Thank You!!
I want to give you back!
You are welcyti California, to rest, talk, cook ( I’ll cook for you) and just relax.
Your post is so heart warming and remind each and every one of us that we are humans. To stop ,get off the train and enjoy the view.
Sending you a big hug
I’m here for you
Thank you so much for reading and for your kindness and support, Dee! That means so much to me–virtual hug received and sending lots of gratitude and love to you❤️❤️
I don’t come back to many vegan bloggers – been doing vegan for a very long time so don’t feel like i need to – but I regularly check yours out because your recipes are GREAT!! And you reply to comments and queries which is cool and makes me feel part of a ‘community ‘ of sorts.
Hope the move goes well!
Take care
xxx
That means so very much to me Jane, THANK YOU! It’s posts like this and sharing/connecting on a deeper level that just recipes that remind me how strong and supportive that community is too☺️ Thanks for being a part of it, much love to you❤️
I just found your site, and the lovely recipe blueberry crunch Icebox cake. It sounds lovely, and I want to thank you for this.
I just want to say that you are strong! I can feel it through your writings…
Yes, life does sometimes wack us in the stomach and throw us for a loop. And, I wish I could say it gets easier as you get older, but at 59, things for me are outta sorts too. We are having to sell a home that my husband and I built and put love, money, and bad backs into for about half of the money it is worth. My husband has been diagnosed with ALS. We don’t know what the future holds, but we are going to buy a 5th wheel, and see the country, while we can! We want to laugh and have fun while life is still good. But, it is also scary…
Good luck to you beautiful lady, you are so full of light…you will shine again, I promise!
Blessings,
Debbie:)
Debbie wow, THANK YOU so much for reading but mores for sharing your own messy-ness. No one has it all figured out and just when you think you do life reminds you you don’t. But yes, that truly is where the light and strength comes from. I am grateful and without regret because I know myself better and am more unapologetically me because of the struggles of the past few months. I wish you TONS of luck with your current challenges, and I hope your leap into the unknown is filled with fun and struggles that make you stronger than ever❤️ xo
A very beautifully written post Natalie. Its something i struggle with as well to just be easy on myself and be ok with the emotions.
And dog pictures always make me happy. I made an insta for my dog and follow other dogs there, thats my happy place.
Hahaha I need to do that! The most pure and happy part of instagram I bet🐶🐶 There is a Brene Brown quote that says “what we don’t need in the midst of struggle is shame for being human” and I resonate with that so much. Wishing you all the luck embracing that too, and much love to you for reading Richa❤️ xo
Natalie,
I read your post yesterday but only now have the chance to comment. I’m sorry you are going through a tough time but obviously you’ll come out stronger. And others have already said but it bears repeating, take your time with returning to the creative churn! It will knock on your door when you are back to full strength !
And a newly built apartment sounds very exciting! I can’t wait to see what kind of light you have for your videos. Take care, and may many more kind strangers who have the wisdom to ignore crying step into your life, haha. Dee xxx
Aw that last sentence made me smile, Dee😊😊 It was a wonderful reminder of the kindness of the world, and also to sometimes BE that kind stranger for someone else even if it feels a little like overstepping. Yes the creativity and motivation is already slowly creeping back, it’s such a funny and hard to control/predict thing. But I truly TRULY appreciate you for reading and taking the time to respond. Means so much to me, friend❤️ xo
Oh girl, sometimes life just plain sucker punches us, doesnt it? I look forward to hearing about how you come out the other end of this and life back in FL. Please always feel free to share your truths with the world, society needs it just as much as you do! Lots of love.
It really really does😆 But yes always makes us stronger and more self assured on the other side I have found, once I have enough distance to see it. Thank you for reading and the kind support, Amanda! Happy friday❤️
Hey Natalie,
It seems to me you are very connected with the present, the moment, yourself and that´s what life is all about! Vulnerability is noble, so thank you for sharing yours.
I´m too a creative person and reading your post made me think, that less creative waves are ok and are part of our growth and enjoyments.
Grateful for the wonderful blog you created!.
PS:I´ve found your blog perhaps little over a year ago and always reccomend you, your recipes are deliciously creative 🙂
Thank you so much for reading Joana💕 I do feel quite in touch with who I am, so I’m glad that came across here. And even mores I hope it inspires you to be compassionate with your creative ups and downs too! Thank you so much for sharing the recipes, happy weekend to you😊
Oh gosh. I could’ve written a very similar blog post – the emotional tiredness, the moving situation, mean comments and kind people! I’m not sure about you, but blogging definitely doesn’t pay well so if you can get sponsorship opportunities for brands you love, YOU GO GIRL! I 100% can see that every brand you partner with, you actually love and aligns so well with your blog. Blogs need to make an income in order to provide FREE recipes to our readers. It’s just a reality.
I feel like my life is a mess too atm – you’re not being unpositive, you’re just being real and accepting/embracing the situation as it is. I’m all up for seeing the bright side of things BUT sometimes life just sucks and no amount of positive thinking can change the situation. Maybe I’m putting in my experience too much here. But I just wanted to say that I hear you! It’s nice and important to chat about this real and raw stuff. Better out than in!
And oh gosh. Acts of kindness. Moral of my day! I lost my wallet yesterday but thankfully got it back today. It made my day SO much better…. I don’t need any extra s*** atm. Sending all of the love xo
It truly means so much to me that you took the time to read and comment on this one, Anthea❤️ I am sorry to hear life has been messy and not shiny for you lately too, but yes sharing and relating does make the down times much better. I truly believe most of life’s happiness comes from connection, even if it’s connecting over the struggle. Ohmygoodness how lucky!! That must’ve been a hella stressful day, but I am glad it ended well. Kindness when you don’t expect it is so beautiful☺️ Sending you lots of love and gratitude, and I hope your story swings up soon too😘😘
I can only echo what’s already been said, but that doesn’t make it any less true. I love reading your blog and all parts of it. Whether you are explaining the inspiration behind a cake, writing about the technical reasons why coconut sugar works better than maple syrup in a particular recipe (hello crispy cookie edges), describing the delectable moment when one of your sumptuous culinary concoctions meets tastebuds 🤤, patiently replying to one of a zillion comments regarding flour substitutions, or writing about emotion/vulnerability/introspection, your writing is always SO spot on and a joy to read. You’ve always been so kind to me with your personal recommendations and genuine willingness to help me make the perfect birthday cake for my children (and you did! Twice!!). It’s clear that you invest so much into this blog and it I hope that you know how much all your efforts despite (or maybe even because of) everything that goes on behind the scenes are appreciated. Also, thanks to that commenter, I now know that you have a YouTube channel (how on earth did this escape my notice before?!)! Another way for me to enjoy Feasting on Fruit! 🤗 XX
Ohmygoodness! Aleks your comment is lovely💕 And honestly sums up the many reasons I type here better than I ever could hehe. Interacting with beautiful humans like you and helping with cake questions and getting to see/hear about the final bday success is the bright fulfilling part that offsets and negativity other people may throw at me on the internet. And yes, I do have YT! Although if you follow me elsewhere you are seeing all my videos already😊 Anywho, THANK YOU so much for your support here and over the years. Much love and happy weekend to you❤️❤️
I love your blog so much – I check it most days in the hope that a new recipe will have popped up, or simply to browse for inspiration. It’s genuinely my bible when it comes to vegan oil free baking, and I can truly say that I’ve learnt how to create yummy vegan treats thanks to you! I absolutely love reading about you and your life on the rare occasions you share little insights, and I hope you know how loved and appreciated you are by all your readers – we’re not JUST interested in your food creations! Sending lots of love, gratitude and healing magic your way. Looking forward, as ever, to trying out your new creations in the future x
This was so touching and quite truly put a smile on my face. Your support and recreating of my recipes means the world to me❤️ But damn this sentence: “I hope you know how loved and appreciated you are by all your readers” really got me☺️ I have definitely realized that is true with this post and all the love I have received for it. It makes me happy to know that I am not the only one who appreciates vulnerability and talking about the not always easy times. Thank you so very much for reading and commenting, and I wish you the happiest weekend! xo
I actually like your personal posts best. 🙂
More please!
Aw thanks friend❤️ Much love to you!
I have not noticed the “alot”of sponsored posts that your “friend” talked about. Ahhh those trolls. I absolutely love seeing these types of posts, feel free to bring us more if you feel the pull. Its these posts that I read right away and even go back to. I love your recipes and I seriously question if magic truly exists whenever I make one of your recipes! (I tell tons of ppl about your site and I also tell them how magic exists bc of you and the ability to make desserts without added sugar).
Sometimes, even if you do everything right and perfectly, you’re honest and open and truly sorry for whatever wrong there may have been on your part, life is just messy. And sometimes it’s just not meant to “work out”…but maybe it does in way? Maybe it is working out, even if it doesnt feel like it or circumstances aren’t showing so. What if theres protection and favor in things going the way they are? Moving is hard, broken relationships are hard, life is just hard for reasons we cant always see. But I hope you can (and it sounds like you have) find the good in moving back to FL and step into what God has next for you. Prayers for you, my friend.
Ohmygoodness Megan! Your comment flowed through my mind so gracefully as I read it, touching all the emotions I’ve been experiencing but with a beautiful calm optimism and acceptance. You have no idea how much I appreciate your words and prayers and the fact that you took the time to read and share them with me❤️ Much love! xoxo
Ohhhh, you’re so very welcome! I know what it’s like to bare your soul for the universe and then hear crickets, so I always like to give affirmation back especially when your words have touched me and if I can relate or if I’m nodding my head ‘yes’ like crazy through the entire post lol!! Safe travels back to St. Pete. I used to live there so maybe our paths have crossed in the past and we didn’t even know it! 😉
Chin up!
Stove on!
Peace, out
Thank you❤️
You’re a star, love. Keep pushing/hang in there/walk tall! <3
Thanks for the kind words, truly appreciate your support Bianca❤️
I’ve niticed that in times like these, it helps to care about someone else. Like you care about your dog. No wonder you think she’s the greatest.
Life sucks sometimes. And the most valuable life lessons can be pretty agonizing. You’ll get there.
And one day, maybe you can be ‘the parking lot guy’ for someone else. Best of luck and love to you.
Yep absolutely! She’s been through so much with me, doggos are definitely extra important in the dough times. And I love that outlook of passing it on, one day being that kind stranger for someone else who is in my place now😊 Thanks for reading Jen!
I’m so glad that I found your channel on YouTube, everything is creative and delicious.
I hope that everything goes well for you in the future. I find myself feeling what you’re feeling as of late also. I couldn’t think of a word before to use but “emotionally exhausted” describes what I’m feeling.
Your blog and channel are amazing and please continue to make your videos. They are awesomely delicious and I often turn to them when I’m in a slump because I know that I’ll find something delicious to make!
Thanks for reading this one Shawn, I truly appreciate that. Yes “emotionally exhausted” is a phrase that feels so very true for me right now. I’m glad I could put to words how you are feeling, but sorry to hear it’s been a rough patch lately for you too. Sending you positive thoughts, it will get brighter for both of us–the struggle only makes us stronger and the good times all the sweeter☺️
Love from Canada!
First I must say thanks you, because have enjoyed several of your recipes. Especially ice cream this summer. The pictures are so great, I just can’t resist 😉 I don’t read much blogs and I don’t go on social media, to be honest, but one thing is sure : you can’t please everyone and that’s ok. It’s so easy to criticize online! Social media are great to demonstrate intolerance in all areas and subjects. Live and let live, we say in French.
Just continue doing your best and remain true to your convictions, that’s how you’ll feel good (beside eating good food)!
Cheers
Live and let live is absolutely my philosophy too, I wish everyone lived by that. Social media does tend to bring out people’s most judgy sides, which is sad. But also a good test of my own self worth, constantly reminding me that the judgments of people who don’t know me really aren’t about me…that’s strength. I appreciate you taking the time to comment and for all the kind words of support❤️ And glad you are enjoying the recipes too, especially ice cream because it’s my favorite🤗
Wow! I love your recipes – just stumbled across them actually and cannot wait to give them a try – but even moreso I love your courage and ability to challenge your vulnerabilities. You must be an incredible person for simply doing this, and I sincerely hope you continue to honour the beautiful person who is YOU and remind yourself of this constantly. Regularly gving yourself kindness, as you already seem to be doing,, is also a key – you are SO worthy. You’ve probably already done so but reading “The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F#*k” might be good. Good on you Natalie!!!!
Hi Barry! First of all I am so happy you found me and my recipes, but mostly THANK YOU for taking the time to read this post. That means a lot to me☺️ Vulnerability is so important to me, and yes self kindness is definitely key during the struggle times. I haven’t actually read that one, but I have heard many good things. Okay I will give it a try, thanks for the rec. Wishing you a lovely weekend!
It’s good you know it’s okay to just say no simply because you want to. It’s important to be able to step back and unapologetically take care of yourself. That’s not selfish; it’s modest, recognizing and respecting your own limits. It reminds me of a wise proverb: Better is a handful of rest than two handfuls of hard work and chasing after the wind. May true happiness be yours!
Ohmygoodness! That is beautiful, than you so much for sharing such poetic wisdom❤️
I have just discovered your site and I love it! So many amazing recipes. I just finished reading this and I want to thank you for your vulnerability and telling it like it really is! It is 100% refreshing and so helpful to know others are experiencing loss and sadness while moving forward in their lives. It makes us all feel a little bit more attached.
Thanks and I hope your days are brighter!
So happy you found me and my recipes Mindy, and I truly appreciate you taking the time to read this more personal one too❤️ Sadness is inevitable at some point in life for all of us, and there is beauty in that commonality. So true, so well said. Much love to you!
Just found your blog after doing a random vegan chocolate cake recipe search. Can’t wait to see what you’re all about, but after just reading this lovely and touching post, I know we are best friends. It’s now October and I hope your new chapter is bringing you tons of joy and fresh inspiration. Thanks so much for going to the share.
Aw Kathleen! This is so kind and thoughtful and, I just read it twice❤️❤️ I am honored that cake could bring you here, but truly so appreciative you took the time to read this non-cake post too. And yes, definitely getting closer and closer to joy these days! Much love and let me know if you need help in the cake hunt😘
You are adorable Natalie! Thank you for inspiring me by sharing your TRUTH and BEAUTY. Just found your site while looking for a fat-free, raw and vegan dressing. Super excited to try it out tomorrow. You are a treasure and so glad I found you 🥰
Haha aw well I am happy the dressing hunt could lead you to this post somehow, and I truly appreciate you reading this more personal one Pauley. Hope the dressing turns out well too!
Thank you for sharing. I have just found your site today, and I just watched 21 of your videos in a row before I looked you up, and I’m so glad I did! I hope the move has been good and as stress-free as possible (I know that it would be impossible for it to be completely stress-free, but here’s hoping!). I am a North Carolinian, but I live in Charlotte, so we have a different feel than those on the coast. I love NC, and I hope it begins to feel like home to you very soon. I am sorry that anyone was negative toward you in your video, and I am very grateful that you are sharing, and continuing to grow. Just know that it is completely okay to cry sometimes, and feel sad. I hope you are feeling better now!
Thanks for taking the time to read this one and comment Ellie, that means a lot to me! I’ve been to Charlotte many times, I have lots of family there, and yes very different vibe ha. There are definitely things about NC I miss, but happy to be back “home” in FL and the move was crazy but I’m FINALLY settled and so much happier. It absolutely is okay to cry and be a mess and not have it all figured out, I think we all need that reminder sometimes. Appreciate you, and I’m happy you found me <3
Hello, once again I come back to your blog, read some sentences of a meaningful post and feel instantly touched. I can relate to so many things about you (I am also a super sensitive person and by the way sensitive is not emotive! I don’t know if you get that too) so thank you for sharing <3
Thank you for reading Eva! I am happy you cold relate, and very much appreciate you taking the time <3
Came by to get your Almond Flour Sugar Cookie recipe (it’s chilling in the fridge to make with my daughter in the morning) and happened upon this post. I hope things are going well in your life today. Good for you putting yourself out there. It’s so incredibly hard to be vulnerable, especially in our rose colored glasses world. Virtual hugs, and know that even from way up here in Alberta, Canada, you have people thinking about you and putting positive vibes out there for you ♥
Brandi! It means so very much to me that you took the time to read and even moreso comment when you really just came here for cookies. Thank you❤️ Doing so much better these days, and yes vulnerability is hard but I always feel better for it. Much love!
Hi , Natalie, I’ve only just come across this post ! So many months late 🤦🏻♀️ I totally understand you. I just wanted to say hope you’re feeling better generally & you keep doing you! We love your recipes & I think it’s fine to be sponsored! You always kindly show us alternatives too incase we didn’t want to use that specific sponsored product anyway. Happy Holidays ! Lots of Love from the UK x
I appreciate you taking the time to read this one, and yes doing so so much better these days❤️ Much love and happy weekend to you!
More people in this world like you, please.